Tylila Ford

COVID Mommy Blues

I remember like yesterday, hearing about the Pandemic early spring of 2019. Each day, since the beginning of this nightmare, I’ve tried  to put my best foot forward; somedays it has worked and others not so much.

Everything was still normal. I was still walking my child to the bus stop every morning, yes I admit I took advantage of those times, looking back. The normal hustle bustle of yesterday seems like a long memory.

I remember hearing on the news the grim words ‘’Be ready for severe disruptions to your life’’ and wondering how severe could it be? And just like most I shrugged it off a little, but mostly began preparing.

I specifically remember putting my baby girl an Easter basket together, just in case there were no Easter celebrations. 

But, not even the best preparations could have prepared me and my family for what lay ahead.

My family managed to stay well most of the year; Halloween went very well, and so did Thanksgiving, and then out of the blue ‘’ HELL’’ hit our home all at once, Christmas 2020!

Somewhere about the time after Thanksgiving, and I had not thought about it, my 7 year old began to tell me she could not smell anything, then she could not taste anything. I thought, naw, couldn’t be so I brushed it off,  maybe it was just a cold or allergy;  I honestly  didn’t want to

 I believe it could have been Covid. Then about a week later, my youngest son began to complain of aches all over; I again passed it off for just a cold or something.  Surely it could not have been Covid. Not after all the time I spent trying to keep it away. I mean, I’d done all that was told, from a social distance making sure we all wore face masks, disinfecting our food packages, showering each time from coming outside, washing our clothes after each wearing; I mean I was careful as they came. It just wasn’t making sense!

To make matters worse, I had begun to come down with symptoms as well, so I decided to check myself into the hospital and get a test. When I arrived, I was a big ball of nerves, sick and alone, but not too bad. I waited for the results, and my hunch was confirmed’’ I had Covid 19! ‘’ and was sure that everyone in my house had gotten it.  I had just about all the classic symptoms  except the low oxygen. I was so out of it, my older children had to make sure my youngest daughter was logging in for her classes online everyday for a while. I could not cook nor do anything to help my household. But like the mother I am, I wasn’t down long. I kept saying to myself I have to get up, someone has to manage this home. And with my faith in God, I was able to at least hobble along doing it.

Then the most terrifying part of it all is when my husband caught it; though he did not have underlying health conditions he was hit hardest. He went from talking to being breathless. 

His oxygen, and thank God I had picked up an O2 sensor prior, had begun to drop into the upper 80 percentile, that’s when I literally knew he was in trouble, and had to make him go to the hospital. 

Now this is a challenge within itself, knowing most men don’t like to go to the doctor. We fought for a second, and he finally listened when he saw his own oxygen level. 

I must say, I was afraid and alone as a parent. My other half was sick and out of commission. I am a housewife with no job, no friends and no extra income.

For about a week, I had become head of the ship. Me and hubby were only allowed to talk over the phone, because no visitors were allowed in the hospital rooms. 

It was traumatizing seeing my husband on oxygen and barely able to talk or eat, but I prayed and held to my faith, as much as I could, and it was one of the longest weeks I have ever experienced.

Thankfully my prayers were answered, and my husband made it home just in time for Christmas! He was still very sick and coughing all over the place, and pretty much the whole household; but we were still very glad to be together again. We had a decent Christmas. Some presents and even a Christmas bunny that I purchased for my youngest, named Rosie.

It was different from all the other Christmases, but I still felt fortunate enough that all of my family members were still here.

That time had been very challenging, and depressing all at once.

 But, I have truly learned not to take advantage of a single thing anymore, and appreciate even the smallest moments of  life! Perhaps, there is a lesson in all this.

But one can only wonder, when will this all end? Who was to blame? I am ready as I am sure we all are ready to finally get some answers!